As a special favor to me, Flennetar the Paladin agreed to a short interview. My assumption that everyone would know what a paladin is might have been unwarranted, so I asked Flen if he would consent to giving us all behind the scenes details. He was obliging, so here it is.
CP: Flennetar, thanks so much for this interview.
Flennetar: You're mighty welcome, noble scribe. Where should we begin?
CP: Perhaps you could tell us all a little bit about yourself. Firstly, you are a paladin. What is that like?
Flennetar: I enjoy it. Righting wrongs, smiting evil, delving dungeons to find lost treasures, then donating them to the local orphanages. It's a full life.
CP: Perhaps you could tell us all a little bit about yourself. Firstly, you are a paladin. What is that like?
Flennetar: I enjoy it. Righting wrongs, smiting evil, delving dungeons to find lost treasures, then donating them to the local orphanages. It's a full life.
CP: Now you are what they call an "Old School" paladin. What does that mean, really?
Flennetar: I'd say I'm the "oldest school" paladin, if you follow. Ha ha. Really that means I'm a knight. See the armor? Knight. None of your holy warrior business for me, laddie. Clerics are holy warriors. I'm a righteous stomper of evil. Lawful Good for life!
Flennetar: I'd say I'm the "oldest school" paladin, if you follow. Ha ha. Really that means I'm a knight. See the armor? Knight. None of your holy warrior business for me, laddie. Clerics are holy warriors. I'm a righteous stomper of evil. Lawful Good for life!
CP: So you don't have any special evil fighting powers then?
Flennetar: Well sure, I mean, I do have a few "buffs" I believe they are called. Never get sick. That's quite a boon. There you are in some fetid swamp hunting down a tribe of nefarious bullywugs and half the party comes down with dengue fever, but not old Flennetar. Never get sick. Ever. Which is nice. Then there's the whole detecting evil thing. That's a bit tricky.
CP: So you can just detect evil? Like a metal detector.
Flennetar: I don't know what that is, but yes. I detect it. Then I smite it.
CP: You keep using that word, "smite". Is this some sacred paladin ability? How does it work? Do you somehow add the force of your personality to a blow that harms evil things?
Flennetar: No. That's stupid. I hit it. Hard. With whatever I'm holding in my hand. Preferably a sword.
Flennetar: No. That's stupid. I hit it. Hard. With whatever I'm holding in my hand. Preferably a sword.
CP: So let me get this straight. You see evil, then...
Flennetar: I smite the hell out of it.
CP: Okay, let's take another view. Take me through your average day.
Flennetar: Well I wake up and have a light breakfast, poached egg, some fruit, whole wheat toast, then calisthenics. A quick bath and then I usually go into the dungeon. Pretty standard really, find evil, smite the hell out of it, get loot. Sometimes I find a person in need and do a quest. Then it's supper and off to bed for a good night's sleep. Then I wake up the next day and do it again.
CP: Doesn't that ever get boring to you?
Flennetar: We paladins have a saying, "When you are tired of smiting evil, you are tired of life."
CP: And are you?
Flennetar: Am I what?
CP: Tired of smiting evil.
Flennetar: Not on your life. Some of your modern paladins get a bit confused about their role in life. I've seen some of them that aren't even lawful good! How the hell does that work?
CP: I've heard it said that paladins are good for dealing with undead, but otherwise they aren't up to even regular fighting man chores. One person even told me that a fighter with a magic sword was much more useful and effective. How do you feel about such claims?
Flennetar: CODSWALLOP! These kids today wouldn't know a paladin if one of us came up and smote them on the arse. A paladin is a fighting man, but so much more. In my day you counted on plate armor, good steel, and smart dungeon crawling. None of this adding light damage to your swings and taking a short rest. Encounter power? See this steel clad boot? This encounters evil, right in the balls. Faith, courage, a foot to the balls...that's how we dealt with evil.
CP: And a holy sword?
Flennetar: Well that goes without saying, but those are few and far between. It's hard to come by a good holy sword. You might destroy a hundred vile liches and never find one in your life, or you might be shaking down some hobgoblin bridge extortion scheme and there's a holy sword lying in a treasure pile. Ah yes, luck of the dice and providence, that's the life of an adventurer, sir.
CP: Any final words of wisdom for the audience?
Flennetar: Drink your milk. Strong bones are the foundation of a strong and noble body. And when in doubt, smite.
CP: Thank you for your time.
CP: Okay, let's take another view. Take me through your average day.
Flennetar: Well I wake up and have a light breakfast, poached egg, some fruit, whole wheat toast, then calisthenics. A quick bath and then I usually go into the dungeon. Pretty standard really, find evil, smite the hell out of it, get loot. Sometimes I find a person in need and do a quest. Then it's supper and off to bed for a good night's sleep. Then I wake up the next day and do it again.
CP: Doesn't that ever get boring to you?
Flennetar: We paladins have a saying, "When you are tired of smiting evil, you are tired of life."
CP: And are you?
Flennetar: Am I what?
CP: Tired of smiting evil.
Flennetar: Not on your life. Some of your modern paladins get a bit confused about their role in life. I've seen some of them that aren't even lawful good! How the hell does that work?
CP: I've heard it said that paladins are good for dealing with undead, but otherwise they aren't up to even regular fighting man chores. One person even told me that a fighter with a magic sword was much more useful and effective. How do you feel about such claims?
Flennetar: CODSWALLOP! These kids today wouldn't know a paladin if one of us came up and smote them on the arse. A paladin is a fighting man, but so much more. In my day you counted on plate armor, good steel, and smart dungeon crawling. None of this adding light damage to your swings and taking a short rest. Encounter power? See this steel clad boot? This encounters evil, right in the balls. Faith, courage, a foot to the balls...that's how we dealt with evil.
CP: And a holy sword?
Flennetar: Well that goes without saying, but those are few and far between. It's hard to come by a good holy sword. You might destroy a hundred vile liches and never find one in your life, or you might be shaking down some hobgoblin bridge extortion scheme and there's a holy sword lying in a treasure pile. Ah yes, luck of the dice and providence, that's the life of an adventurer, sir.
CP: Any final words of wisdom for the audience?
Flennetar: Drink your milk. Strong bones are the foundation of a strong and noble body. And when in doubt, smite.
CP: Thank you for your time.
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