Tuesday, April 12, 2011

Pirates of the Caribbean

I was reading Amazon, looking at reviews of the Pirates of the Caribbean edition Game of Life...and discovered something disturbing.
THERE ARE STUPID PEOPLE IN THE WORLD.
Of the reviews I read, before my own lungs came up to throttle my brain to save me from madness, I noticed a disturbing trend of people who had, as their chief complaint, the 'fact' that the edition I was viewing had "nothing to do with POTC".
I sussed it quickly.  These people seem to think that Pirates of the Caribbean is a movie franchise.  Amazing how quickly Disney built that bloody ride after the unexpected, runaway success of Curse of the Black Pearl, innit?
A few facts, just to clear the air:
The Pirates of the Caribbean is a dark ride that was first opened in Disneyland, in California, in the year 1967.  It featured a humorously lusty crew of audioanimatronic pirates sacking a Spanish town.  The only named character that can be verified is the mayor of the town, who is referred to as "Carlos" by the woman, presumably his wife, in the upstairs window as he is being dunked in the well.
Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl is a film, based upon the ride(s) that premiered in 2003 and was a blockbuster to the joy and surprise of the Walt Disney company.
The edition of POTC Game of Life to which these reviews were appended was, essentially, the theme park edition, not the film franchise.
And just so we are clear, there really were pirates in the Caribbean centuries before either the rides or the films.  I cannot verify the existence of Spanish mayors named Carlos, but it seems plausible.

So to anyone on Amazon who wrote or will write a review demonstrating such seeming ignorance, as much as I enjoy the film franchise and Johnny Depp's work, please, understand that the world did not begin when you woke up and 'discovered' it.  Got that, Columbus?  Good.

1 comment:

  1. All I am waiting for is the big screen adaptation of "Space Mountain". It'll be about this roller coaster that flies into space and merges with a mountain then hilarity insues. Get Adam Sandler to be the roller coaster and Rob Schnieder as the old man of the mountain. Doesn't make sense? It's Disney!

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