Wednesday, October 17, 2012

22 things I learned about Mexico

1. Outside of the resort area of Cancun the Yucatan looks like North Carolina, sometimes Pungo and very often P-Town.
2. South Park is still funny in Spanish.
3. They still have the WB, vice the CW, and it sounds so much more dramatic when the announcer says, "Somos Warner!".
4. If you give them USD they give you back Pesos and their personal exchange rate is based on convenience.
5. Tamarind tea tastes lovely.
6. There is an amazing amount of Scottish people on holiday in Cancun.  They burn easily.  It is amusing.
7. They drive very fast and whip round traffic, but don't seem to have much road rage.  I put this down to the Jesus medallions hanging from the rearview mirror of all the taxis.
8. A taxi driver will take you anywhere for "5 dollars" whether it be 20 miles or 4 feet.
9. Everyone in Cancun pronounces "Virginia" as "Birginia" but people from Mexico City say "Vir-hi-nia" and that sounds a bit naughty.
10. Iguanas don't give a shit about you.  They sit in grassy patches on the side of the road unconcerned with your endothermic arse.
11. You can, if you so choose, purchase silver, hand made jewelry, Cuban cigars, marijuana, cocaine, Viagra, and/or prostitutes from a nameless guy on the beach.
12. When you cross state boarders the Army will try to hold up the bus driver.
13. They have a "Police Touristry Department".
14. They put pico de gallo on hot dogs.
15. The Spanish word for Hot Dog is Hot Dog.
16. The bus driver interprets your hotel's location "as the crow flies" not as is convenient to your getting to the front door.
17. You can have "Beef Tips Mexican Style" for breakfast.
18. It is fun to barter with a street vendor but you still pay too much.
19. If you don't know how much something costs it is 20 Pesos.
20. Lupina is the nickname for girls named Guadaloupe.
21. My name does not translate well.
22.  There is a bloody Starbucks, Margaritaville, Hard Rock Cafe, and McDonalds everywhere.

And 1 thing I learned "in" Mexico:
23: People are people no matter where you go and regardless of your nation's political and economic views the free market is alive and well in the hearts of mankind.

Light a pumpkin, mates.

1 comment:

  1. There is a McDonald's in every foreign country I've ever visited. Well I'm not sure about Brazzaville, Congo because we weren't allowed outside the hotel except to be bused to back to the airport. And there has been a Hard Rock Cafe in most.