Saturday, October 20, 2012

Pirate Costumes-1 Bell

Make our heading south-by-southwest and furl the topsail, we've more pirate costumes to discuss.
In the matter of pirate attire the question of coats, waistcoats, both or neither is a reasonable topic to consider.  As we saw with the Jack Sparrow costumes BEFORE, a pirate look can be achieved in different ways simply by varying your upper body attire.
Pirates in coats
A is horrible.  The coat option is a good one for cold weather locales during Halloween as it keeps you warmer than the no shoe, waistcoat and headband options.  There is a certain logic to a pirate costume, or any costume for that matter.  You have to decide how you are presenting your subject matter.  In the case of pirate costumes consider that you are not out to sea (unless you are at a party on boat, which you could be, how would I know otherwise?) but indeed ashore.  Your pirate look would be most appropriate as the pirate or pirate captain shoregoing rig, yes?  Sailors, and thus pirates, would have their normal workaday set of clothing and then a better set for going ashore.  The coat, boots/shoes, fancy hat and jewelry look does have its place as an interpretation of a swaggering, successful pirate ashore.  That being said, A is like a pirate that wants too badly for you to realize he is a pirate.  Sure, I can see that on some sort of recruitment drive, say gathering up a crew at Petit-Goave, but even then adorning yourself in skull-and-crossbones motif is just trying a bit too hard, wouldn't you say?  Also I think the mustache is far more Wyatt Earp than pirate.  The lacy jabot shirt front?  I don't think he's recruiting for a crew.  Oh, he's looking for some men and there will be booty...
B is clearly going for the Blackbeard angle and it is not bad.  The black and gray color scheme is a bit severe but imposing.  The hook hand is cool and sets him apart from the basic pretty-boy pirates we've seen thus far.
C has me confused.  On the one hand the stylish waistcoat faux gold trim and red sash add a splash of flair and the eye-patch is classic Halloween pirate.  There are no questions that he is a pirate.  The shirt is more nonspecific medieval fantasy and the trousers are just loose like sweats.  The boot toppers ruin the look I think.
D is just crap.  The velour trousers, the big black doo-rag, the crappy boots and pseudo-Sparrow wig all combine to make this character look like a polyester poseur.  The coat would look better on a highwayman or Regency gentleman.
That first guy is totally going to try and sell you pizza.
Still want a coat but don't like the first set of options?  Why not go for more of a Captain Morgan look?
These three options are inspired more by a rum bottle than a film idol.  The first is wearing shoes.  Blessing of!  The buckle look is due to an accessory that you add to regular shoes, rather like spats, which make them pass as buckle shoes at a distance, in the right lighting or if the observer has been drinking.  The stockings and short pants really sell the look but then you get to the cummerbund the whole thing starts to fall apart.  The coat is not bad (nor is it good) and I really think the eye-patch and mustache combo is going a bit far.  Man I hope that is a false mustache.
The second guy is just a twat.  He looks like one of those town crier guys you see in European tourist towns (or at Ren Faires).  The too bulky closed coat, shapeless indeed, is clearly meant to hide a lack of accurate garb beneath and he suffers from SPBS (shitty puffy boot syndrome).  Thankfully he's got that drunken douche face and fake rum bottle to help "sell" it.
I like the guy on the far right; I can't help it.  That's a nice outfit.  The flare in the blue overcoat, the gold patterned waistcoat and the frills on collar and cuffs (yeah, those are attached to the waistcoat and jacket respectively) make for an authentic looking pirate ashore.  This particular costume is called Cap'n Cutthroat and will set you back about $170.  It does have it's drawbacks of course.  That's not a hat, for one thing.  It is a "headpiece".  It is open crown.  Such a nice coat and waistcoat, but you get a tiara?  Sod that.  A costume like that with shoes instead of boots and you'd be on your way, mates.  The eye-patch does add some flair.
Maybe coats aren't your thing.  Maybe you live in a warm climate even in Halloween season.
Maybe you are just pro-waistcoat.
A bit hot out here for a coat, don't you think?  
If your pirate is going into action but not ashore you might say a coat is too much.  That's when you go for the waistcoat look.
Check out the bloody buccaneer on the left.  Yarr, there's a pirate.  Cutlass and gun are a nice touch and the all black look is intimidating.  Not accurate, but intimidating.  Of course the beard doesn't look too good and the boot toppers are showing the laces of the sodding shoes!  Very poor costuming.  Lest you think this costume is a good choice I should tell you that according to the product description it does not come with "eye patch, facial hair, gun, sword, pants or shoes." But hey, you get those crap boot toppers.
The other guy comes with everything but the pants (and shoes beneath the boot toppers).  It is not a bad look, being somewhere between classic literature pirate a la Treasure Island and classic Halloween pirate look.  If you dressed in that fashion people would know you are supposed to be a pirate.  Uninspired pirate, but a pirate all the same.

Steer a course for the worst of the storm and let the winds blow...things are going to get charybdic.

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