As bad as those items are on the picture above, they create instant recognition of your buccaneer status. The waistcoat or vest is almost guaranteed to get you in, especially if it is gauche enough to sport the old skull and crossbones. I wouldn't be caught dead in it, but hey, what pirate would. (Well, all of them, logically)
|Hands on hips not the best look for a pirate trying to be intimidating.|
The two pictures above show a really nice bad-ass set on the left, with stylized eye-patch, cutlass and hook, again all you need to say, "I'm a pirate of no great skill or luck," and on the right is a Jack Sparrow accessory kit. No, really. See, if you want to be Jack Sparrow you can purchase a Jack Sparrow costume, but all the little details will not be provided. This proves that costume shops are also into piracy. I'm pretty sure that the furry thing is an official Jack Sparrow merkin...but then I don't go to those kinds of parties.
Hah hah hah...so you are on a tight budget, eh? Down to yer last few doubloons and need some new kit? What you see above is the most "affordable"* pirate accessories in any port. You can tell they are pirate accessories because they have the old Jolly Roger on 'em. I'm pretty sure they are made of plastic and denial.
Here's fun: Pirate Masks! You don't have a beard? Don't want to wear a fake one? No problem, buy a mask. Of these masks you can see that only one looks human (and that mask-glove-shirt combo on the left is wretched I might add). The reason for this is the wonderful undead pirate concept. POTC did it and made it look great, so why not give it a go, yeah. 1 is pretty bad, though. The mask is subpar, the gloves look crap and the beard on the skull is just wrong. I'm not saying you can't have a bearded skull (well, yes, technically you can't, I know) but if you are going that route wouldn't a grizzled grey one look better? This particular undead pirate looks as though he's just used a comb through hair dye. Is he going ashore for wenches and wishes to cut a more dashing figure? Who can say? And if you find someone who can, get them to explain why his eye-patch is so raggedly torn open. (Yes, I know, so the wearer of the mask can see...but it can be hidden so much better).
How about #2? I like it. It's cheeky and fun. Here the classic pirate headscarf, earring and patch are paired with a stylized skull. It's a great mask but it would need a costume. It deserves a good one, but a classic striped shirt and torn pants would probably work just as well. Waistcoat is optional.
Now #3 is a fine mask indeed. It is gruesome and horrid and wonderfully nasty and it extends to the chest, so you can get that all over effect. I like the hat as well.
4. The less said the better.
Shiver me timbers and all that rot.
And with that we are primed for our last installment. See you on the midwatch, mates.